Flow

If there is something you are convinced that this is the only truth and should be shared to everyone, since they might not know it. It could be false idea in my opinion. There is no definite truth for everyone. I probably tried to find this definite truth and have been struggling. I noticed that it is hard when clinging something and no open space within myself. It is ironic. Definite truth, but no open space, so it is making you suffer even more.

I try not to fall into that hole this time. I am reading several books, literature, philosophy, and current books, trying to look at things from various points of view. I try not to stick to one idea that is appealing. I used to stick to some ideas that sounds like the only truth. Eckhart teachings are so liberating, but I am not clinging to it anymore. I question sometimes. Life is complicated and not that simple. So this is where I am at right now.

The flow. The flow is life itself. I am the bamboo flute where the flow is coming through according to teaching of Kim. I am in the present moment right now. Trees are just beautiful, from my window. My mind is limited. But, the present moment is limitless. Present moment contains everything. Possibilities. Not-knowing is in it. I don’t know what is coming next. I don’t know where it takes me to. I don’t know what I am writing about it right now. This is just the flow of energy. I am doing this maybe because I am trying to grip of what the flow is all about. There is no reason or objectives behind it. Not knowing. I am another human body that is experiencing it -the very thing that ancient people also perceived. Nothing-ness. My Ego is not happy….it is still irritated to find something more meaningful, trying to start something different. Watching movies from amazon prime, doing exersize, cleaning a room, reading a book next to me. Trying to fascinate someone who may read this even before releasing it. Trying to make amendments of typos. so may so many things that my mind wants to do. Something useful, meaningful, important, sophisticated, organized, impressive things are welcome. Not this. Rambling stuff. “Flow????”

Mind is hard worker, I am impressed. This is amazing in a way.

Flow. It is also amazing this moment is never coming back. It is so obvious but it is so amazing when once realized. The flow is only flow that I can experience just this moment. Every moment is like that. Never be the same. This breath. This breeze. This sound. It is never be the same. This encounter. This light. This life. This surroundings. This people. This neighbor. This me.

Never be me again maybe next time. I am not here anymore. I am full of mind and erase this sentences. This me is only me I could experience just this moment. It is so subtle, fragile and vulnerable. I hope I will come back and stay the same. but maybe not.

Why do I forget this miracle so easily? Why am I so vulnerable to trouble? Why am I not stubborn enough to carry on? Why am I not humble enough to feel happiness forever?

Not that I know of.

I cannot do this any longer. I have laundry to handle. The minutes I started to thing this, the flow is gone. Flow is not man-made.

I don’t know so many things. I have many questions that I am not sure yet. I want to think when it is really necessary.